Thursday, May 14, 2020

Skipping the Vernal Pool

Last week, Deb raised the issue of how far to push our kids with “school” work when they’re clearly not giving it their all-- because of laziness, boredom, more pressing priorities (e.g., Fortnite), or other reasons. Sometimes I push, and sometimes I don’t. Since Deb’s post I’ve been more reflective about when, why, and how I make my kids persist with things they don’t want to do.

I’ll admit it usually comes down to whether I personally value the activity or assignment. Is it a persuasive essay? It’s gotta show solid effort. Need to find the least common denominator? Keep at it, or tomorrow’s assignment will be even harder. But then there are things I let sit untouched or half-baked, like to write (again) about signs of spring based on a naturalist’s vernal pool observations; learn to do an Electric Slide; practice the trumpet.

As I make these sorts of subjective decisions, I dabble in guilt about the ways in which I’m inserting my own values into my kids’ daily choices. What if they would be great trumpet players, kickass Electric Sliders, or vernal pool experts if I actually were to give them that push?!? What if the school’s mindfulness videos would really be great for my kids if we all took them seriously (we either skip or to be ironic watch them in double speed)?

I realize that as a parent of young kids, I’ve always been a strong influencer of their behaviors and thinking about what’s important. The difference right now is that there are so many fewer opportunities for other people (classmates, friends, teachers, coaches...) to influence their ideas in different ways. Given that, shouldn’t I cast the widest activity net possible to make sure they give due attention to more things that might stick? Should I be doing the Electric Slide with them right now?

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